Brief

From Stratford Rodeo... I don't BS!!!

Thursday, Aug 16, 2007

I freestyle a lot, and I HAD to do what I said... I came up with this bad boy on my own... thanks!

So, as part of the "Great Refrigerator Round-up" across Ontario, you buy a new fridge (a more energy efficient one, which is any fridge/freezer), and call Hydro... they take your old one away at No Charge, and you could save up to $150/year...

In Stratford, they had a mascot... a Fridge.

Announcer Joey says, "Hey, if you have a digital camera, be sure that you get a picture of yourself with the Fridge, and where will you put that picture? The picture of you and a Fridge?.... c'mon, play along....ON YOUR FRIDGE"

So, never a hypocrit, and always the one to take it to a new level...

here's a picture of a picture of me and a fridge ON MY FRIDGE.

The only way you can trump that one is to...well, I don't think you can!!!!

"Vwat are you doing der?"... I got hit by a car...

Wednesday, Aug 15, 2007

So, I Super Dave Osbourned it today.

If you've been reading my notes: http://blog.myspace.com/rodeoannouncer... you'll have read about my rodeo adventures, cooking experiences, and now....the I got hit by a car story.

They say you should get your eyes checked every year. I call BS on that, especially when it's the optricians who recommend it. Oh yeah... I'm a conspiracist... like dentists tell you to brush 3 times a day... I think Toothpaste causes cavities... of course they want you to get those... but I digress...

Anywho...

I go in for my eye exam, 4 years since my last one. My perscription has moved up just a lil' bit, but, it's good to get new lenses with the current needs of my lookers, so, I upgraded. My lenses were scratched baaaaaad anyway. So, they dilated my eyes. They warn you not to drive for 3 hours. Once again, I call BS on that, because I have a slogan..."I'm Joe %$'n Scully, mo fo!"

I purchase my lenses... and of course, have to wait an hour, and I go shopping. I'm a little freaked because I can't read my Blackberry clearly. I go shopping for my sis' bday present. The item selected from her list is NOT AT THE MALL, however, I find out that there's a nearby store that has it.

So what does the Dilated Dummy do? Prepares to drive.

Well, apparently, the pupils are sensitive to light (hence the Blackberry problems... it has a bitchin' bright screen)...

I stroll out of the mall...through the side exit by Mall Administration... open the door, it's WAAAY Bright out... two steps across the sidewalk, across the street/parking lot... WHAM!

I walked into a moving taxi cab.

Yup. I didn't see it. I habitually glanced left and right, but, the sun was bright, and I guess I saw White, and that was alright...

luckily, I'm spry, and instead of Super Dave Osbourning it across the hood, I was able to do a lil' spin and stop myself with my hands.

Ol' Tajhinder Taxi-guy gets out, "Vwat are you doing der?"

and I said, "directing traffic, you didn't see me?"

It didn't hurt, but it scared the heck out of me.

Then, I proceeded to go to the truck and drive to the store... Nyce! I almost wrecked about 6 times across my 4 turns and 1/2 mile trip.

Into the store I ventured... wearing my huge-ass Sunglasses, as my eyes are burning... my pupils were dialated, and my eyes were WIDE OPEN from freaking out... and I couldn't see a thing...

But, Ray Charles was able to make his purchase and return to the mall without accident... ok, without more than one accident.

So, let me hop on a soap box... don't drive with Dialated Eyes. Don't Shop with Dialated Eyes. But if you do... wear a helmut!

The Popcorn Incident

Tuesday, Aug 14, 2007

So, the other night, I kinda head home after having a few Keith's with an old friend, and upon arrival back at the homestead, I'm craving a few more.

Chatting on the phone, I down a few more, (it's like 1am Sunday Night...), and then I get a lil' hungy.

Scanning the cupboards, Bachelor Joey didn't purchase any snacks on his last few grocery excursions... however, ex-y left some popcorn behind. So, I think, BONUS!

Now, if it was Joey, it would be simple Microwave Popcorn, but ex-y decided that popcorn made on the stove was better for some reason... so, I try to figure the mess out.

I get directions off the phone.

"use oil"

"ummm, no oil. Corn Starch?"

"no, oil"

"there isn't any. Soy Sauce?"

"no, oil"

"this will work. Balsamic Vinegar?"

"no, you need oil, otherwise it'll burn!"

"oh, ok. I'll use PAM"

"ummmm, maybe not a good idea. But, if you must, use A LOT"

I spray away, load 'er up, and of course, go to the other room. Why? I have no idea.

All of a sudden, I hear, BEEP-BEEP-BEEP-BEEP...a nice Fire Alarm at 1:30 in the am...

I go running down the hall...

I'm a little gunned at this point, so, I'm about to Stop, Drop, and Roll. Not on purpose either...hahaha, I'm like "Oh, MY GOSH! hehehe... hick"

I grab the smoking pot and take it outside

Coughing, I assess how much popcorn is edible...

about six kernals, and I eat those bad boys.

And the most upsetting of the entire ordeal?

My clean stove got wrecked. Who knew me and the appliances had so much in common????!!!!

Scully: Professional Bull Rider

Tuesday, Aug 7, 2007

Scully: Bull Riding in Leamington, ON

This is how cool technology and rodeo fans are...

I was in Leamington, ON for a rodeo. There weren't enough people riding the Mechanical Bull, so, I decided to "plug it"... the Scully way...

with my wireless monitors and wireless mic, I did my big plug walking over to it, hopped on, and rode it. Buddy put it on real slow, and I was like calling him on over the mic... haha.

Fans took pics, googled me, and e-mailed them to me.

Leamington Rocks!!!!